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When I was a child we moved many times (21 in 18 years) so my brother and I were always the new kids on the block. I don't know how old I was when I formulated my concept of how to "fit in." It was really quite simple and I continue to use it when meeting new people to this day. I decided that people were like quilts and that, in order, to get to know them all you had to do was find a square on your quilt (personality, interests, etc.) that matched or coordinated with a square on their quilt. When your guest spoke about finding routes to conversation with others it reminded me of that concept. It is so true that all you need for civil discourse is to find a common language. We, people, are so much more alike than we are different.