I am a hospice caregiver and have been working with patients with dementia and AIDS for 15 years. In all my experience suppoting families I work with I have found a positive space to go one. But, to date, my most devastating experience is the loss of my grandmother to alzheimers. I spent time doing respite for my aunt and uncle living with her and felt fortunate to have the skills to deal with her dementia and her eventual nursing home placement. Many family members choose not to face their own pain and continue to spend time with her. This frustrated me. At her funeral I was angry at them...irrational as this seems. I struggle why my grandmother "deserved" this fate. I lose it when I hear the word alzhemeirs...I can't even watch those commercials for new medications. I turned on the radio this morning and almost turned it off but decided to engulf myself in the kind words spoken...it helped. The comment that love endures thru it all that even when a person doesn't know who the family member is they know they sill love that person. I hold that thought close to my heart. I so appreciate this opportunity to blog and continue my journey as a caregive to process this grief. I hold my memories of the "unraveling" process of my grandmother's illness as a gift in a way...thank you so very much!
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