Addiction is an artery to a higher calling. Addiction speaks to you about what you long for deeply and are not encountering or nurturing in your life. I have spent many years addicted to food and compulsively overeating and binging. It is only recently that I have started to understand my compulsive behavior as a desperation to be mothered, to be nurtured, to be nourished. I can' t ever get enough because I don't know how to experience satisfaction for something I have never known. In exploring the bottomless appetite, the insatiable desire for sweetness, I have encountered a longing so powerful and shattering that it is almost mystical. But only when I set aside the compulsive abusive behaviors and allow myself to experience the longing in my body. What a ride it has been!
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