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I want to read Jane's book. I could have written this, it so speaks to my own experience from 2000-2010. The 10 years after my father died, and I became my mother's care-giver - me - the one named as the "antagonistic" one...and also a care giver for my developmentally disabled older brother. It was a long, rough, exhausting journey - yet, a healing one as well, for both of us. It is amazing the stories we all share in our silence. Mom passed last Nov at 94.