The ultimate paradox is, no matter how realistic, rugged, fair, proper, complete, appropriate your efforts or projected solution (to life's problems) is, tomorrow you are starting all over again, you will have this same general problem!
Think back: if you had been where you are now ten years ago these are just the problems you would face. It would have been ten years earlier and now you would have a different set of problems but it would still be a version of the issue: "What am I going to do now?" "Where are we?" "What are we working with?" And, "What can we make out of it?" There is noting you can do to avoid that--except die, get Alzheimer's or willfully avoid it--in which case, you don't have what we would call 'full and proper human life.'
It's a creative process. It requires two somewhat opposed but complimentary--and mutually absolutely necessary, efforts--becoming aware of things as they are and making something that doesn't yet exist, isn't yet the case.
The two great things you have to fear as a conscientious person, are 'chaos' and 'order'.
Chaos: is nothing, by definition. That is, everything might be there but it doesn't count in any meaningful way, it isn't working toward any useful purpose (except maybe as a randomizing process in scientific experiments)!
Order: is NAZI Europe, Stalinist Russia, Maoist China, Pol Pot's Cambodia--Creative, productive, conscious, conscientious (where it matters what you do in any meaningful, estimable way) 'human' life is somewhere in between...and every day it's up to us to find it!
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