I wake up on the couch all stiff and sneezy. Oh, I am angry ... still angry. In my aviary there are dishes to clean. I am ignoring my audience—a room full of birds--as I turn my back and stay with my thoughts. Afterall, I have a plan to formulate.
Heyoka says sweetly, “Hi, birdie.” She's using the same intonation I use with her when I’m trying to make her feel better. I don't fall for that trick. Grrr!
A few minutes go by. She makes another attempt. This time, her attention makes me recognize where I am holding the stress in my body so that I can stay angry and “out of my mind." I am rarely able to sustain this much passion indefinitely.
On second thought, maybe I will stop putting my energy into this new future. it doesn’t coincide with my bigger picture. I quickly melt, step back into my body, and find my spirit uplifted in a room full of my familiars. Talk about neural wi-fi! The sanctuary in my aviary helps me recognize how easy it is to reconnect.
Over the last few weeks I've painted four murals. In the process, I left my body behind spending hours pouring over tiny detail, holding myself in strange, uncomfortable positions, not sleeping, not eating, and promising my body it will soon be over. Finally, I don't think it believes me anymore. That makes a strange kind of sense. No wonder my energy got stuck this way after ignoring all but what I wanted to achieve.
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