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I heard you talking about the existence of God - here is my experience.
Religion - My Faith
God is not a physical God but a spiritual God composed of the thoughts and actions of man – how we treat others.
I am having trouble believing in God & Christ. I spent 2 semesters at Bible College to learn some of the ideas which follows.
Point 1 - In the days that the bible was written, writing was new and anything written down was considered believable. Anything anybody took the time and effort to write down was a major task. Hence, the emphasis of the Ten Commandments on tablets of stone and Christ’s moniker as the Word of God.
Point 2 - Moses came out of Egypt with the idea of One God because the Egyptians had multiple gods. So the Bible did not begin with Creation of the World and Man, it began with Moses.
Point 3 - Birthright was a major issue in those days. The Hebrew saw that no matter how well a man obeyed the Law of Moses he could not be considered a child of God because of his birthright.
The 12 apostles may have been answering the problem of the non-Jewish believers by creating a God (Christ) who could accept anyone who believed.
Point 4 - The Hebrew were like Rocket Scientist when it concerned matters of religion. It was no problem for the writers of the Old and New Testaments because they did not have modern media such as TV and Radio to occupy their time. And 12 apostles working together would have no problem coming up with the idea of a Christ who could bring religion to the non-Hebrew believer.
Although my belief in God & Christ is shaky I do believe in some Higher Power. I can feel it when I do something wrong and when I do something right. But apparently this Power does not have much influence on my life. I can tell by the bad stuff that happened to me as a child and every time I see or hear about a child who is retarded or badly deformed from birth. That God would allow such things to happen to the innocent is not acceptable.
I used to drive a School Bus for the special-ed and handicapped. This sounds crude but my dog has more cognitive ability than some of those kids. Does God have no power or is He just unfair and without compassion? The Bible does not have anything to say about why these children are like this. Why the emphasis on Christ as a healer and compassionate Being? One 4th grade little girl was like God’s little angel but she and her mother burned to death in an apartment fire.
I want to believe in God but when I pray nothing happens that I can say is definitely from God. But I still pray anyway because I have nowhere else to go and it makes me feel better. I refuse to play what I call the Guilt & Blame Game because of something I did wrong or I am not praying hard enough.
God’s Love My Love
God’s Love is like Fire
When kindled can penetrate anything
My love is like glass
Is solid but is seen through and breakable
I Love Life but I also Hate Life.
My normal frame of thought is, I will be glad when it is over.

Thought: Jesus said, “Father forgive those who don’t know what they are doing”. He did not say Father forgive those who know what they are doing.
One word in interpretation can make a difference.
When Jesus walked there were no critics to inspect what was truth, so that may not have happened. How can we believe in something we can’t prove?
I have a problem believing in the bible.
But I do believe that God is within us, and He is stronger when we are together in peace & love. Thus, the Holy Spirit.
So, we are God. He is not a physical being but a spiritual being made up of the thoughts of man. We are not the creation of God, but God is the creation of man.
But I still consider myself a Christian because of my association with the Church of Christ and how my life has changed since.
I can’t prove my thoughts and ideas but nor can the Bible be proved. We can’t go back in time to prove it.
We have plenty of evidence that God does not exist – Why can’t we have some evidence that he does exist.