I'm not sure where to begin. Although I think that people who are suffering in any way merit our concern and help, it seems quite selfish to hang on to anyone who is in constant pain, whether mental or physical or in cases where one is threatened with a loss of all dignity. I remembering hearing a father talk about a son who suffered daily and I heard in his writing his reluctance to let him go but his desire to see the suffering of his son stop no matter the cost to himself. To my way of thinking, that is love. Perhaps it's time for a discussion of Jojo Moyes' book "Me Before You."
I chose early on to not kill myself because of what it would do to others. Never have I received from anyone the same kind of love and consideration. Furthermore, in our society, which treats money and wealth as god almighty, it doesn't help to hear constantly how little value you have...even to the point that if you are poor you don't deserve to have a refrigerator.
It is also very lonely to not be able to talk about one's desire to die. It is unacceptable and not safe. Even the comments on a recent article about suicide, there was an expression of vitriol against these "losers." Our society does not want to hear about any pain or misery you might have, especially if there is no cure for it. No one wants to listen, even if it does help a little, if they have to hear the same thing day after day. I know it's hard because I do that for others. But there is a paucity of people out there who care enough to do even that.
Until we have a society that can value people, I for one think we need to start by taking the stigma away from suicide. We need to honor the courage it takes to face death. We need to be available to find out why one wants to die; to be willing to listen at length; to offer help; to understand from their point of view.
And finally, we need to be able to offer continued sustenance, if not help in the form of relief, to those who suffer if they are going to be able to make a healthy choice to live. I just don't see that happening any time soon in our society.
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